DEAR DEIDRE: My partner spends £ 250 a week on cigarettes but then moans that he has no money.
He doesn’t contribute anything to our bills, so I have nothing left at the end of the month.
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He’s 37 and I’m 34. We’ve been together for three years.
I love him and he’s not a bad person, but his behavior is so selfish and unfair.
I never spend anything on myself and I can’t save any money either.
He seems to think cigarettes are a necessity because he can’t do without them, so I should be understanding.
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I earn more than him, but part of that is because he doesn’t try to find a better job.
I told him about it and even said that I wanted him to move out if things didn’t improve, but he didn’t take me seriously.
DEIDRE SAYS: Your partner acts like a child. He expects you to support him, as he spends his money on his unhealthy addiction.
You need to make it clear that either he is contributing his fair share or you want him to leave.
My support pack, Standing Up For Yourself, should help.
Stopping smoking would improve both their health and your relationship. Suggest that he contact Quit (quit.org.uk, 0800 00 22 00) for help.
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